Sex has long been a taboo subject in the Philippines. Religious beliefs and traditional beliefs have long pushed people to remain prudent, in the way they act, speak, and dress, which makes talking about sex and intimacy hard, even among their closest friends and family.
But it seems times are changing. A recent study by Bumble in partnership with Filipina-founded sexual therapy-based app in the Philippines Unprude, showed a whopping 78% of women say understanding both emotional and physical intimacy is crucial in relationships.
The survey also revealed that 84% of women believe sexual compatibility is vital in a relationship, and if there’s a lack of compatibility, 55% would discuss this with their partner.
Sexual compatibility is essential in relationships, and unfortunately, working it out doesn’t happen at the snap of a finger.
In a statement, Unprude founder and certified Sexologist Dr. Rica Cruz shared her four tips on how to build intimacy in relationships.
1. Begin with emotional intimacy
No better way to build sexual intimacy than by starting with emotional connection, said Cruz.
How do you do that? By engaging in activities that foster emotional closeness, and even vulnerability. Share personal stories, discuss your future goals, or simply spend quality time together are surefire ways to build emotional connection.
2. Be curious about each other’s desires
Being in a relationship allows you to discover new things about each other, including your desires. Be sure to make space and discuss what works for you and what doesn’t and ask for your partner’s too.
Said Cruz, sexual compatibility isn’t just about physical attraction. So go learn about each other’s turn ons. Talk about what makes you feel valued. Ask your partner what makes him cringe. This way, you can learn and measure whether or not you are really compatible sexually.
3. Consider being playful
Playfulness can break the ice, and when done right, it. can also make intimacy less intimidating. You don’t need to go straight into sex toys — consider playfulness even in conversations.
Those fireside questions a la “Fast Talk?” That’s one way of introducing playfulness in conversations.
Enlist the help of conversation cards and allow for meaningful conversations. Unprude’s version, found on its app, are even designed to also spark playful challenges between partners.
4. Remember, it’s a journey
Building sexual compatibility takes time and effort. so don’t feel frustrated if it doesn’t click instantly, Cruz reminds.
It’s important to keep exploring, communicating, and most importantly, having fun.
The survey was rolled out online from September 21 to 26, 2023, to 26,849 Bumble members worldwide, including the Philippines.
In January, Bumble released its dating trends for 2024, one of which is the rise of Val-Core Dating, which refers to the increase of people valuing engagement on issues that matter to them.
— Hermes Joy Tunac/LA, GMA Integrated News
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