The woe and wonders of being a seafarer’s mother

SEAFARER stories are often threads of hope, struggle and courage woven together in a great fabric of adventure across the vast oceans of the world. They are a fount of anecdotes told in a succession of emotions.

They are, as history proves, good storytellers.

Missing in most of these stories, though, is another thread — that of the mother who carries another world of emotions the moment her child leaves home to become a seafarer.

Mila Lago is one of them.

Lago is a typical Filipino mother — nurturing and protective. Letting her brood leave the nest is an inescapable ordeal. Nonetheless, she let them sail. After all, she was a seafarer herself.

Lago, 65, used to be a hospitality crew for the American cruise line Princess Cruises.

She knew that such floating luxury hotels were more than equipped with all the comforts needed and wanted by men. She also knew, however, that such luxuries were reserved only for passengers.

“My daughter and son are hospitality crew for the ships of Norwegian Cruise Line manned by C.F. Sharp Crew Management. While I know that they have everything they need onboard, I still believe that nothing beats the care of a mother,” Lago said.

She conveyed the fears of a mother whose children will be out of her sight and reach, albeit temporarily.

“We have to accept that they will encounter eventualities that they will have to deal with themselves. As parents, we could only hold on to the fact that we’ve raised them well, strong, and ready to face the challenges of the world.

“My children understood early on that their mother is a seafarer. Despite the distance and loneliness, and even without us impelling them, they have both decided to follow my path. I knew how hard it was to be at sea, but as a parent, we have to support their dreams. It may be difficult, but we also have to accept the fact that they will lead their own lives,” Lago shared.

“We need to let them grow in their own ways. We need to have faith in them, and should worries or doubts cloud our thoughts, let’s stand by our faith in God that all will be well,” she added.

Lago is a proud mother. It can be told by the way she talked about her children.

Both children are graduates of Hospitality and Tourism Management, and her daughter, the eldest, is now the assistant concierge manager for a cruise liner.

“I am happy with all the milestones they have achieved and the fulfillment they get from working at sea.

“Before they embark on shipboard duty, I would always remind them to pray for guidance and protection, exercise patience in dealing with different people, stay out of trouble, and no matter what happens, I am here for them. Always,” she said.

Finding joy in Seafam International

Lago is the type of person who would not easily slide into invitations to join organizations. With Seafam International, however, her winds of fate blew in a different direction.

“I immediately felt a sense of belongingness right on the first activity I attended with them. There was, in fact, a sense of relief in knowing that I was with the right people. I could be myself — just another seafarer’s mother. There was no judgment. There is not even a blabbermouth in the group. It is warm and welcoming and comfortable,” Lago shared.

Seafaring Families (Seafam) International is a nongovernmental organization that provides support and social services to seafarers and their families. It was founded by Arianne Rocha, wife of Miguel Angel Rocha, president and chief executive officer of C.F. Sharp Crew Management.

“I am grateful to Seafam International because it made my relationship with my children even better. It also introduced me to a group that empowers one another; we are one solid rock in supporting our founder, Arianne, especially during the National Seafarers’ Day Celebration last June 25.

“It is amazing that with my age and even after retirement, I can still be a part of something huge with national relevance in our seafarers’ history,” Lago concluded.